“…I shouldn’t have left you… Without a dope beat to step to.”
Anyone who really knows me, knows that I stanned hard for Aaliyah back in the day! But…. This isn’t about that. I’ve been gone a long time. I’m not really sorry. And yeah…
So here we are! Here. I. Am. And so much as changed since the last time I wrote here. JJ started Kindergarten. Ivy is in a Pre-K3 program. I got a tattoo… I turned 30. I’m still married… Depressed, sometimes, but mostly happy. But, I can say that I’m getting a little better at expressing my feelings.
Okay, that was a lie. Truth is… I’m still struggling with the truth. The parts of my life that have to remain unspoken. I’m dying on the inside, feeling like there isn’t anyone who understands my situation.
As much as I need to release this negative energy, I keep feeling like it’s never the right time. I can’t remember a time in my life where I was this confused and out of my mind. I’m hoping that this is like… a mini mid-life crisis, because I don’t want this to be life. This CAN’T be life.